Paris Hilton needs to shut up
And then there's Phil Jackson and Kobe Bryant. Jackson called Kobe "uncoachable" in his book, but I guess he thinks he can do it, because he's back in the Los Angeles saddle. Jackson says "it's a matter of trust, a matter of rebuilding the trust that we had," while Kobe says that Jackson is "a proven winner. [Choosing him] is something I support." Please. Jackson is schtupping the owner's daughter, and in a few years he'll be co-owner of the team and he will ship Bryant faster than Bryant can cheat on his wife. And that 10 million dollars Jackson will get paid for coaching probably goes a long way to making Bryant coachable, right, Phil? Shut the hell up, you two.
But Paris ... ah, Paris. How delightful it is that people still stick microphones in her face and encourage to spout inane things. Today she talks about her impending nuptials: In two years, she'll retire from the glamorous world of pseudo-celebrity and become a dutiful wife. Whatever shall we do? Here's the gospel, straight from America's Messiah:
"I don't enjoy going out anymore. It's such a pain. It's everyone saying, 'Let's do a deal! Can I have a picture?' I'm just, like, 'These people are such losers. I can't believe I used to love doing this.' " (Read Newsweek - yes, NEWSweek - out on Monday for more - I know you can't wait!)
Have another hamburger, Paris, and shut the hell up.
Krys is still in a holding pattern, by the way. My sister said she knew someone who was three centimeters for two weeks, so who knows when this thing is coming out. She's wanted to be out for two months, so I don't know what the holdup is now. She dropped and Krys is 60% effaced, so we'll see. Childbirth makes you use icky words like "effaced" and "dilated," so if you can't handle it, you might want to check back later!