Natalie Portman cut-outs, solutions in Louisiana, alien Batman, plague-infested rats - these links are totally Airwolf!
Anyway, if you're in the mood, sign my GuestMap. What could it hurt? It's not like I'm going to use the information in any way to track down dissidents when I become dictator ... but I've said too much.
So let's hit the links! It's always fun!
Ah, the humor. Why don't we start with funny crap?
Oscar Madison has a bad trip to New York.
Dave Barry thinks we should cheat on our taxes. Who am I to argue?
Chris talks about writers of fan fiction. Sort of related to comics, but very funny and worthwhile reading.
Chris had a weird week at his comic book store. Here is his epic tale of the Natalie Portman cardboard cut-out. Strange days, indeed.
Yes, I'm directing you to Chris's Invincible Super-Blog a lot. He had a funny week. Here are six short stories about Chris. One of them is about Tab!
Kids write about what careers they want. Surprisingly, very few want to be teachers. Even fewer want to be cashiers. Good call, kids!
Ever wonder why Starbucks doesn't have microwaves? The mystery revealed!
Is nothing sacred? I found this at Factum - Face the Fact.
Roxy discovers the issues with having a much younger husband.
If anyone watches Arrested Development (and if you're not, why the hell not? It's one of the best television shows out there), you may or may not know that I'm Oscar.com actually exists. Worth it just for the haiku.
Top ten reasons beer is better than Jesus. Good stuff. This is from the Disgruntled Chemist.
Former Intern Andy is evil to customers. He's going to hell, but you can laugh as he goes.
What should we do with Louisiana? George Bush has a great idea! I got this from Andrew Sullivan.
Danielle has issues with her grandmother. Ah, family.
Do you want to turn your hamster into a fighting machine? Sure you do! Find out how here!
Here's a critique of Klingon society. You might think you're too cool to read this, but it's very funny, even if you don't like Star Trek (like me).
This is, by far, the best complaint letter ever. Read it - you'll agree. I found this at Mr. Snitch.
A girl discovers things she can do. Don't worry, nothing too icky, although it does involve poop.
Discussing using "Airwolf" as an adjective. No, it doesn't make a ton of sense, but it's very funny. Use it in a sentence, like this:
People say Derek looks like Steve Buscemi. He explains why this is not a compliment.
Sarah has very funny hurricane pictures. Okay, they're not really hurricane pictures, but they show what would happen in a hurricane.
Funny things kids say that sound dirty, but aren't.
Wow! A new category! Hooters-related news! Soon, Hooters will rule the world!
It's the Hooters employee manual! Very interesting reading. Apparently Hooters girls should expect and accept sexual harassment. Now that's a swell place to work! I found this on Cyphering. Speaking of Hooters, Welcome to Blog doesn't like the restaurant, and gets mail from Hooters girls complaining about Hooters-bashing!
Since last Monday was Talk Like a Pirate Day, let's have some pirate-related links.
Yes, it's Pirate Batman and Two-Face! If all the comics featured Pirate Batman, it would be so much cooler. The picture is crappy, so I didn't steal it, but it's pretty neat.
And if you have ever wondered what it would be like if Pirates Ruled the World, this Photoshop contest gives you some answers. This is from Pharyngula.
Some comic book links. You can't look away!
Those of you who aren't comic book fans won't get this, but those who have even a passing familiarity with All-Star Batman & Robin, the Boy Wonder (yes, for you non-comics people, that's its full name) will enjoy these:
This is from Chris Sims.
This is from Kevin.
This is also from Kevin.
Finally we have this one from Dave's Long Box. Click it enlarge if you can't read it, because it's funny.
Comic books in the LSAT? Why not?
Hey, it's alien Batman! So much is explained ...
I stole this from Tom Peyer.
Did Morrison's Animal Man foreshadow "Infinite Crisis"? You be the judge!
Scipio really hates Peter David's Aquaman. The comments are good, too.
We had to get political sooner or later. Don't hate me for bumming you out!
The Senate asked John Roberts what kind of movies he likes. I don't have much of an opinion about Roberts, but I very much doubt that it fucking matters what kind of movies he likes. Unless he says, I don't know, Triumph of the Will or Birth of a Nation, it doesn't matter! I found this on Unqualified Offerings.
Speaking of the Supreme Court, here are some idiotic quotes from Democratic senators: Patrick Leahy and Herb Kohl. I don't have a problem necessarily with Democrats voting for Roberts, but not for the reasons these guys gave.
Interesting stuff here. Lots of conservatives are starting to really bash Bush.
The Rude Pundit really hates Bush and really likes Clinton. As usual with the Rude Pundit, this is very funny and definitely not for children.
Maine has turned down federal funds for sex education. Why? Because the feds specify they can only teach abstinence. Sheesh. Stupid Republicans. The fun thing is, Maine's teen pregnancy has dropped precipitously in the past few years, so they're doing something right. I found the link at Donklephant.
Here's an interesting problem for anti-war activists.
Now, I'm sure Hugo Chavez is as evil as the right-wingers say he is, even though they never offer any proof except that he hangs out with Castro. This article explains quite a bit about his policies and what he is doing that makes the United States mad, and why that's not necessarily a bad thing. Unabashedly pro-Chavez, but still interesting.
There's been a bit of buzz about Phil Donahue debating Bill O'Reilly on The O'Reilly Factor. Here's the transcript. It looks like Donahue really did demolish him, as the title of the article suggests.
Even Ann Coulter is pissed off at Bush. When Ann "Tax cuts make me want to touch myself" Coulter doesn't like you, you're either doing something really right or something really wrong. This is from Andrew Sullivan.
Who doesn't want to know what's going on in Burma? This blog clues you in. Yes, the author calls it Burma. Not Myanmar. It's an act of defiance, apparently. Good for him!
Where was George Bush when the country needed him?
The miscellaneous that isn't so fun. Still worth your while, though!
Americans don't know science. Depressing.
Here's a scary story: plague-infected rats missing from a lab. Excellent. Something else to worry about. I found this at the Cranky Professor.
Senegal does not like Gambia. Why should you care? Well, it's fascinating and it's about two countries you never here about. So check it out.
This is a story about a horrible (but very popular) children's book and the Australian authorities' efforts to get it banned. Because, you know, who cares if the kids are actually reading. Here is the author's site.
A woman arranged for two older teenagers to have sex with her 13- and 14-year-old daughters. To cure them of their obsession with sex, said she. This is from Ace of Spades.
Banned Books Week starts today. Read a banned book today!
The Free State Project is awesome. Libertarians moving to New Hampshire and turning it into a government-free utopia (okay, not exactly "government-free," but close enough). Go, Libertarians! I stole this from Chris Cope.
The frivolous miscellany.
Why, it's the Japanese Ronald McDonald. Oh, those wacky Asians! I stole the picture from Drink at Work.
Ben Franklin is back from the dead! I got this from Through the Looking Glass.
This should solve all your problems about what your kid should wear on Halloween, right? Who wouldn't want to wander the neighborhood in this?
Buy it here. I got this from Tom Peyer.
Ice-T will produce David Hasselhoff's rap album. Yeah, read that again. This has to be a joke, right? Right? Maybe not, as I've seen it a lot of different place, but saw it first at Ace of Spades.
I'm sure you're all interested in the 100 greatest math theorems, right? Sure you are! Number One is the proof of the irrationality of the square root of 2. Super fun! I saw this at Laura's blog.
What is a clew? Find out here!
Ever wonder what the nadir of Western Civilization was? It might surprise you. Find out what it is here. This is from Donklephant.
I don't mean to pick on Tara Reid (if you haven't seen Taradise, it's awesomely awful - and canceled, by the way), but the folk at Go Fug Yourself make it so easy:
As they point out, if you have to write it on your ass, it's probably not true.
What a nice Byzantine church. Read all about it at San Nakji's blog.
Sarcasmo's Corner has links to a bunch of Where Are They Now? posts, including: Famous sidekicks, the cast of The White Shadow, the cast of The Bad News Bears, and the cast of Debbie Does Dallas.
This is Park Central Mall in Phoenix. I have no idea where the site is in the city, as I have never heard of this mall, so it is probably long gone. I got this, of course, at Malls of America.
The mascot at Evergreen State College in Washington is the Geoduck. Yeah, I don't know what it is either. Go read the fight song. Does it seem ... a little risque? I'm not singing that, because I might get arrested! I found this at Andrew Sullivan.
What the heck is this thing? Well, it's not a spider. It's still wacky.
I found this, by the way, at Pharyngula.
Well, that's all for this week. I hope you enjoy them.
By the way, does anyone know how to get these to open in new windows? I know it's annoying if you're actually checking these out to keep coming back to this page. So if you know, share the knowledge. I beg of you!