Roger, ripping off an unnamed blogger, published his list of famous people on whom he had crushes, and challenged us to do the same, either by leaving comments or posting about it on our own blogs. As I have a blog and shamelessly rip off others' topics all the time (well, not all the time, but I'm not above it!), I thought I would take him up on his challenge here. These are, of course, not girls from school or anything, because that would be meaningless to you. No, as Roger's is, these are famous people I dug, for whatever reason. Let's get to the list, as we peer deep inside Greg's depraved mind!
1.
Daisy Duke (
Catherine Bach), 1979-80. I watched
The Dukes of Hazzard for most of its time on television, but that first year was dynamite, especially when Daisy showed up. Dang, she was a hottie. My eight-year-old brain couldn't quite process it. I wasn't terribly interested in girls until much later in my life, because I was still a rough-and-tumble boy, but Daisy showed me that when I became interested, there would be something nice to look forward to!
2.
Bailey Quarters (
Jan Smithers), c. 1980. Loni Anderson was the sexpot on
WKRP in Cincinnati, but come on - Bailey was super-sexy. She was smart, sarcastic, and funny. Yes, Jennifer (Loni Anderson) was smarter than most of the people at the station, but her character always felt a bit fake, whereas you could easily imagine knowing someone like Bailey. And whenever she took those glasses off - hubba-hubba! Like Daisy Duke, she was one of those women who made me realize there was a lot more going on with girls than I suspected, even though it would be years before I explored that. I read on
this site that Smithers was in a pretty serious car accident last September. That sucks. I haven't read anything about her recovery, except that as of December, she had a lot of broken bones and still couldn't walk. Send good thoughts her way!
(This is a pretty cool picture. Smithers was, oddly enough, on the cover of Newsweek in 1966, when she was 17. What a weird thing.)
3.
Sarah Purcell, early 1980s. Ms. Purcell is someone that is probably far-from-crushworthy, but I don't care! I loved watching
Real People back in the early Eighties, as it was funny, featured interesting people, and had very funny hosts, including
Fred Willard. But Sarah was the hottie on the show. Considering she's only five years younger than my mother, maybe I had some Oedipal issues I was working out back then. Many were the nights when I wished I had Sarah Purcell and Fred Willard as my parents! And
Peter Billingsley could be my cool older brother (he's almost exactly a month older than I am), with
Byron Allen the non-Caucasian uncle from one of my grandfather's many dalliances! Oh, the joy! (Oh, I'm kidding. My parents are awesome. But I did have a big crush on Sarah Purcell. About that I will not kid!) (And no, I couldn't find a better picture of her. She's just pimpin' fine early Eighties products!)
4.
Phoebe Cates, 1982. Any straight male under the age of 30 (at the time) who saw
Fast Times at Ridgemont High knows why:
Dang. You know we're all about high-brow entertainment around here! I still liked her in the two
Gremlins movies (especially the second one), but this moment is iconic.
5.
Jennifer Jason Leigh, 1982-1994. I absolutely adore Jennifer Jason Leigh, and think it's a tragedy of epic proportions that she hasn't won an Academy Award yet (and
Big Lips, among others, has). Leigh, of course, burst onto the scene in
Fast Times at Ridgemont High, where she played the innocent Stacy to Phoebe Cates' more worldly Linda, and she quickly put together an amazing résumé:
Flesh + Blood,
The Hitcher,
Miami Blues,
Backdraft (well, I liked it, and she was damned sexy in it),
Rush,
Short Cuts,
The Hudsucker Proxy, and
Mrs. Parker and the Vicious Circle. I like that movie, but that was about the time my crush started to fade. I still love her as an actress, and she's very good in
Dolores Claiborne and
eXistenZ, but she faded out of view for a while in the new century, and I was depressed that she didn't have a bigger role in
Road to Perdition. And, of course, I don't see many movies these days. She seems to be working a bit more recently, so maybe someone will give her a role that will finally win her an Oscar.
6.
Keanu Reeves, 1989-1999. I'm not sure why people denigrate Keanu so much. I'm the first to admit that he's not the greatest actor, but he chooses smart roles and never embarrasses himself. I first started getting a man-crush on him when I saw
Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, which is still a comedic classic. I eventually watched his seminal film role in
River's Edge, which is an absolutely brilliant movie. He followed
Bill and Ted's with
Parenthood, in which he's fantastic, and
I Love You to Death, which is an underrated comedy, and after
Point Break and
Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey (neither of which is all that great, although the sequel is mostly fun), he was astounding in
My Own Private Idaho, showing how good he could be. He shows up in movies by great directors (not necessarily great movies, but by great directors), and he even showed he could do action well in
Speed (after doing it poorly in
Point Break). Of course, he had a small career renaissance in 1999 with
The Matrix, and he did a pretty good job in
Constantine. Keanu is a far better actor than he gets credit for, and he's one of my two man-crushes on this list.
7.
Sherilyn Fenn, 1990-93. Man, Sherilyn Fenn should have been a classic movie star. She's not the best actress, but she's not the worst, either, and she has such classic movie star looks. It's like she was born about 50 years too late - if she had been an actress in the 1940s or '50s, she would have been huge. I never watched
Twin Peaks (I know, shocking), but she was a pin-up icon for a while in the early Nineties, and I actually bought the issue of
Playboy in which she posed. I still have not seen
Two Moon Junction (Krys has, weirdly enough), but I have seen
Meridian, which is a truly awful movie. I saw
Boxing Helena, but by that time I had moved on in my crushes. She's still working relatively steadily, and she has a
MySpace page (if it's really hers), so if you too had a crush on Sherilyn Fenn, go check her out! And really, who could forget her in
Just One of the Guys? What a classic that was!
8.
Emma Thompson, c. 1991-1994. I still love Emma Thompson as an actress (she was quite good in
Stranger Than Fiction, and I have actually watched good swaths of
Nanny McPhee because she's in it), but my crush phase lasted only briefly, from the time I first saw her in
Dead Again (I later saw
Henry V, but not when it was first released, so it doesn't count), which is an extremely underrated murder mystery, until her brilliant turn in
In the Name of the Father, one of the few movies that makes me cry. In that same year she made
Much Ado About Nothing,
in which she is absolutely gorgeous. In the late Nineties she was under the radar a bit, but she seems to be coming back strong recently. My crush will not return, but I'm always happy to see her working.
9.
Michelle Yeoh, 1993-2000. I first saw Michelle Yeoh in the Jackie Chan vehicle
Supercop, which came out here in 1993 (and stars another actress I had a crush on,
Maggie Cheung) and is a real blast. Yeoh is excellent, fighting and flirting (a bit) with Chan and almost stealing the movie. She was the best part of
Tomorrow Never Dies, which is a fairly decent addition to the Bond legacy, and of course, she was brilliant in
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, which is an excellent movie. She's worked since then, but I've been missing her movies, as I rarely see movies anymore, so my ardor for her has cooled. I still think she's awesome, though, and probably will be the only reason to see the third Mummy movie.
10.
Brad Pitt, 1995-2001. Ah, my second man-crush. I first saw Pitt in
Thelma & Louise, but he didn't really do it for me. Luckily, my first time seeing him was NOT
Cool World, because that movie is, well, awful. Then, I saw (unfortunately),
Interview With the Vampire, but I still didn't have much interest in him (and I still haven't seen
A River Runs Through It). If I had seen
Legends of the Fall in the theater (instead of a few years later), that might have done it, but my crush really started with
Seven. He was excellent in that, and then, a few months later, he was hilariously disturbing in
12 Monkeys. That was it: I had a crush. Of course, it reached its peak in 1999, when
Fight Club came out. It's one of my favorite movies, and everyone in it is brilliant. I also would love to have Pitt's wardrobe from the movie, although I'm not cool enough to pull it off. After that, he was very funny in
Snatch, the best thing about
The Mexican, very good in
Spy Game, and hysterical in that episode of
Friends. Then, of course, he was in
Ocean's Eleven, where once again I would love his wardrobe but couldn't pull it off. Plus, he got to say, "I had never been to Belize" (trust me, it's a funny line). Since then, I have seen fewer movies, he got involved with Big Lips, and his movies haven't been as excellent (although he's quite good in
Babel). I've heard his turn as Jesse James is pretty good, and I still like seeing his movies, but I think my crush is over. So sad!
Well, those are my ten favorite crushes. I've had others (I mentioned
Maggie Cheung, for instance), but they've either been fleeting or not as intense. One retroactive one I've had is on
Daniela Bianchi, because she was a Bond girl before I was born, so I can't really count her. But it gives me an excuse to post a picture of her. Yowza!
What about my vast readership? Any celebrity crushes you care to share with us?
Labels: Beefcake, Celebrities, Cheesecake, Culture, Top ten lists
