Delenda Est Carthago

Why not delve into a twisted mind? Thoughts on the world, history, politics, entertainment, comics, and why all shall call me master!

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Location: Mesa, Arizona, United States

I plan on being the supreme dictator of the country, if not the world. Therefore, you might want to stay on my good side. Just a hint: ABBA rules!

13.5.06

Not one, but two celebrities need to shut up!

From today's Arizona Republic:

[Britney] Spears told the British publication [the Sun] that she would love to make a film with [George] Clooney.

"He's pretty cute, but don't tell my husband," Spears says.

The ideal Spears-Clooney collaboration script would have Spears playing, perhaps, Wonder Woman - from the Island of Amazon Doritos Addicts With a Severe Allergy to Standard-Issue Superhero Spandex.

"I would go nude. And I'd love to play a superhero. That would be really cool," Spears says.

Clooney, of course, would play Maj. Steve Trevor, whose overwhelming sexiness would cause him to be habitually clubbed over the head and stuffed into a barrel, but always rescued by a topless Spears wielding a golden venti Frappuccino of truth. The Nazis, however, would remain clothed and uncaffeinated.
[emphasis mine, because that's what she shouldn't have said.]

Oh, Britney. Oh, dear Britney.

And then there's Clementine Ford, Cybill Shepherd's daughter: "It was tough having a beautiful mother as a kid. High school boyfriends wanted sex with her. I don't blame Mom for being beautiful - but it was gross." Almost as gross as you telling us about it!!!!

Hey, Clementine and Britney: shut the hell up.

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1 Comments:

Blogger Jake said...

Ah... more reminders of both why I got out of the "news" business and why I don't read the Republic.

14/5/06 1:05 PM  

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