Delenda Est Carthago

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Location: Mesa, Arizona, United States

I plan on being the supreme dictator of the country, if not the world. Therefore, you might want to stay on my good side. Just a hint: ABBA rules!

3.10.05

What have we learned - Week 4

As we enter another long week without football (boo-hoo!), let's reflect on this past weekend.

First, a rant. This morning on The Herd with Colin Cowherd, Colin, whom I enjoy listening to because he has some crazy opinions and sticks to them, said that the baseball playoffs were Bud Selig's wet dream (okay, he didn't say that, but it would have been cooler if he did). He said a week ago things were looking bad because the Marlins or Phillies or Indians might have gotten in, but now things were wonderful.

Bullshit. Cowherd is not an East Coast guy, but he's been seduced by the crap that is Red Sox-Yankees. Does anyone west of the Hudson care anymore about these two teams? He also said that it's better that the Astros made it than the Phillies because no one in Philadelphia cares about the Phillies because it's a football and college basketball town. He's an idiot. Sure, Philly is much more a football town than a baseball town, but nobody in Houston cares about the Astros. They like Roger Clemens, but they don't care about the Astros. And Atlanta? Those people haven't cared about the Braves in years. He said Bud liked that the Los Angeles market is represented, but I would argue that L.A. is a Dodger town, and they don't give a tiny rat's ass about the Angels, even after they won the Series. And Chicago doesn't care about the White Sox, either. Sure, it's a huge market, but it's a Cubs market. And no one in San Diego cares about the Padres. If you lived in San Diego, you wouldn't have to live vicariously through sports teams, either. I think the playoffs are interesting, but I would LOVE if the Yankees and Red Sox and Braves and Cardinals all went down in the first round. I am SO sick of the Yankees and Red Sox. Lose, please. LOSE QUICKLY!

NFL thoughts, even though my evil wife made me go out with her the morning so I missed a lot of the early games┬╣:

Well, if you're not a Kansas City fan, that Eagles game yesterday was a great one. I was this close to bailing on it, but what the hell else am I going to do with my Sunday afternoons, right? Donovan McNabb is truly awesome. I'm still squeamish about the Eagles throwing the ball so much, but as long as their offensive line plays so well, it doesn't matter. This was a huge win, because their schedule is very difficult, so every win is huge.

The record will now show that the Cardinals played in front of the largest crowd in NFL history. That's sad. Arizona got its head out of its ass for a while, though, which is nice. I'm sick of people talking about Denny Green as if he was some kind of genius. He's egotistical, and keeps insisting on playing "his" guys, even though his guys might not be the best people he can put out there. Last year he benched Josh McCown after the Cardinals had won two games in a row. Last night McCown threw for almost 400 yards. Sure, it was against the 49ers, but still. When immobile Kurt Warner comes back, want to guess who gets the start? Stupid Denny Green.

I figured the Saints would win their first "home" game, especially because the Bills just aren't that good. Calling Aaron Brooks one of the top quarterbacks in the game, as someone did on ESPN last night, is pushing it. Let's not go overboard, people.

I wrote on Friday, and I quote, "If Mike Martz doesn't do anything insane (which, to be honest, he usually does), the Rams win relatively easily." Where is ESPN with my analyst job, please? I watched some of that game, and yes, the Giants were moving the ball easily, but I missed the Mike Martz insane play of the week - trying to run a reverse at the New York 10-yard line, and not just any reverse, but a reverse in which the running back pitched the ball to the receiver. Fumble, Giants recover, Rams never threaten again. They were only losing by ten at that point, and the Rams were starting to impose their will. Then, it all went to hell. That's because Mike Martz is insane. INSANE!

The Seahawks wuss out on the road. Why won't anyone listen to me???? Okay, here's the thing: Seattle gets the ball back on an interception with a minute left and the game tied. The ball is at the Washington 45-yard line or so. Do the Seahawks try to move the ball downfield to give their kicker a better chance at the field goal? Of course not - that's not how we do things in the NFL! They move five yards and ask their kicker (who's pretty good, to be sure) to kick a 47-yard field goal on the road in front of a hostile crowd. It's not automatic by any means, and he almost made it. What does that say about the coaching staff? They have no confidence in their offense - they don't think they can move 20 yards or so without turning the ball over. This is a bad loss for the Seahawks, because the offense knows Mike Holmgren doesn't have any confidence in them.

I watched almost none of the Denver-Jacksonville game. Jake Plummer threw two touchdowns to an offensive (or is he a defensive?) tackle. One would think the Jaguars would have wised up after the first one. But no!

Everyone knew Peyton Manning would warm up, and he did in a hurry against a bad Titans team. Now everyone has them going 7-0 into Foxboro. Maybe. Probably, actually, but this is the NFL, so don't count those chickens. Is this finally Indy's year?

The Bengals-Texans game was a good one for Cincinnati to win. Yes, they haven't played anyone, and their next three games are against, you know, actual teams, but this was still a good test for them. They were against a team they should have beaten easily, and when it all didn't go their way early, they could have folded like some talented but young teams. However, they found a way to win. The Bengals are looking better and better. We'll see what happens when they play the big boys.

I'm not really sure that the Lions got jobbed at Tampa, but if you read the actual rule book, it does say the video has to be "indisputable." You can dispute the call, so I suppose you could say Detroit should have won the game. But let's talk about the previous 59 minutes, when Detroit intercepted Brian Griese three times and couldn't get touchdowns, or the two plays after the bad call, when Harrington couldn't get it in the end zone. Yes, the call was bad, but good teams overcome bad calls. The Lions are not a good team.

San Diego might be the best team in the AFC. Yes, I know Indy is in the AFC, but the Chargers went into the House of the Champs and beat them up. They just toyed with the Patriots. We'll see if the Colts can do that in a month or so. I'm not really a Patriot-hater, but it is nice to see them get taken down a notch. They beat the Eagles in the Super Bowl, after all, so I must despise them!

I was so close to getting the final score of the Jets-Ravens game (I said 13-6 Baltimore, and it was 13-3). I told you the first team to two points wins! Boy, that was an excruciating game to watch for the five minutes I watched it. Blech.

The Vikings looked crappy, but that's been their thing this year. I'm still waiting for Vick to have a great quarterback game. He'll play next week, even though he got hurt, but Atlanta is getting by on its running game and defense. Not a bad way to get through, but will it be enough?

There were some cool plays in the Dallas-Oakland game. First, the truly horrendous tackling on the Dallas touchdown. Wow. I could have knocked that guy out of bounds. Then, later, the Cowboys tight end caught a pass a few yards short of the first down and was hit immediately. He dragged that guy a few feet, and then a bunch of other Raiders dogpiled him. He dragged about six Raiders an extra eight yards or so before he finally went down. It was awesome.

Well, Penn State is 5-0, but they haven't played anyone of note. This weekend they get Ohio State at home, which would be a huge win. I don't think they're going to do it. I watched the Southern Cal-Arizona State game, and got annoyed. With a little over a minute left in the first half, the Sun Devils got the ball with a timeout and a 21-3 lead. Yes, I know you don't want to screw up and give a great team like the Trojans an easy score, but as Gregg Easterbrook says, You don't dance with the champ, you have to knock him out. So the Sun Devils took a few knees and went into the locker room with an 18-point lead. But this is USC - they can score at will sometimes, and ASU gave USC a chance to regroup (and the Trojans got the ball first in the second half) and they lost by 10. Fortune favors the bold, Dirk Koetter and ASU! Go for the jugular at the end of the half, while USC is still reeling! I was yelling at the TV, but they didn't listen. I had a bad feeling about the second half, and it all came true. Sheesh.

So that was the weekend. Tonight is one shitty team (Green Bay) against one overrated team (Carolina). Watch Arrested Development instead.

┬╣ I didn't really mind. I like going out with the family. It's all so wholesome and Republican!

3 Comments:

Blogger Chris Cope said...

Denny Green is a great coach... unless the game matters. We learned this up here in Minnesota, where we have switched to a coach who isn't really a coach at all. Ticey is a lot like having a Wal-Mart district manager as president. OK, perhaps that's a bad example -- but you get my point.

The NFC North is the greatest division ever. It is entirely possible that the division winner would have a 4-12 record.

4/10/05 10:34 AM  
Blogger Johnny B said...

I never understood why Minny stuck with Green as long as he did. I guess the sale of the team contributed to that.

Martz is not only insane, but he's an arrogant, egotistical prick. Can't stand him, and it was so sweet to see Atlanta lay the wood to them in the playoffs.

Speaking of which, as a longtime/hardcore Falcons fan, the overwhelming anxiety that I would usually feel upon seeing Vick limping off the field was tempered by the realization that first, he was walking and running around, and bet your ass that if the Falcons weren't ahead by 20, he would have been in there. Actually, I was glad they took him out when they did! Plus, Schaub got some reps in and he didn't look too bad. I love Vick and what he can do, but this fragile QB thing is wearing a bit thin...

4/10/05 12:48 PM  
Blogger Greg said...

Yeah, I'd be surprised if the NFC North winner won more than 8 eight games. With 8 divisions, that's just the way it's going to be in the NFL these days. Some people have proposed taking the top 12 teams in the league regardless of conference, which I don't think would work, but it's an intriguing proposition.

I know what you mean, Johnny - if the game had been close, he'd have been in there, but why not take him out? Schaub looked decent, so the anxiety if Vick goes down hard is alleviated a little. I'm just waiting for Vick to have one of those 25-30, 290, 3 TD games. He hasn't had one yet, has he?

4/10/05 1:20 PM  

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