Delenda Est Carthago

Why not delve into a twisted mind? Thoughts on the world, history, politics, entertainment, comics, and why all shall call me master!

Location: Mesa, Arizona, United States

I plan on being the supreme dictator of the country, if not the world. Therefore, you might want to stay on my good side. Just a hint: ABBA rules!


Can you roll with Greg?

I linked to the Could You Roll With Lindsay? quiz the other day. As I mentioned, I stole it from Tom Peyer, and in the comments section, he made a good point: "what makes fucking Lindsay think she's so fucking qualified to roll with me?" Damn straight, Tom! So I have stolen that idea. What makes Lindsay (or anyone, for that matter), think she could roll with me? Can you? Take my quiz to find out!

1. Say after a hard day of fomenting revolutions in some places and suppressing them in others, you and Greg hose off the viscera and chill with some fine liquor. What will make you a true friend of Greg if you order it?
a. A case of Hamm's
b. A shot of Glenfiddich, neat
c. A mango margarita
d. Furniture varnish. I have a big problem.

2. If you were out with Greg, chances are it would be wall-to-wall guys. Where is the most likely place you are?
a. The Prancing Peacock in Provincetown, R.I.
b. The All-Star Gentlemen's Club in Houston, TX
c. Row 22 of the Des Moines Coliseum during a monster truck rally
d. Watching Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure at his friend's house whining about how no girls want to hang out with them

3. Let's say you're chilling at the Ivy in Los Angeles. You know all eyes would be on you, but Greg would definitely freak out if this object of his man-crush came through the door.
a. Orlando Bloom. Ooh, those dreamy eyes!
b. Brad Pitt. That raffish grin!
c. Milton Berle. What pecs!
d. Ernie Kovacs. Man, that moustache is divine!

4. Nowadays, you and Greg would hit the scene in a Toyota Sienna van. Nothing smoother than that! When Greg hits it big on the pro crossword tour, however, you'll be rolling in this:
a. A 1974 Pantera
b. A ZAP car
c. A bicycle built for two
d. We don't roll. The party comes to us, yo!

5. Not that Greg has time for any other job, but if he could do something more than occasionally teaching ungrateful punks and wasting time on the Internet, he would be:
a. A professional yodeler
b. A Greek shepherd
c. A lemur wrangler
d. The King of Siam

6. Greg's closest friends (and that means you, obviously) call him:
a. "Bungie"
b. "The Stain"
c. When they need money
d. "Hey, didn't we know some guy named Greg once?"

7. When you're kickin' it at Greg's crib, you can expect this show to be on the television:
a. 7th Heaven
b. One Tree Hill
c. What Not To Wear
d. The Daily Show with Jon Stewart

8. That time Greg spent in Australia was pretty cool. In which Australian city did he hang for the most part?
a. Melbourne
b. Vancouver
c. Sheffield
d. Pretoria

9. Sometimes you may be called on to do Greg a favor. Hey, what are friends for? One such favor a friend has done for him in the past is:
a. Helping him burn the body
b. Getting his head out of the toilet
c. Fixing the space-time continuum so that Kennedy, in fact, did die in Dallas
d. Taking the blame for Three Mile Island

10. If you want to be an old-school friend to Greg, you should come up to him and say:
a. "Philly represent, yo!"
b. "East side Jakarta is in the hizzie!"
c. "I'm down with the Santiago boyz!"
d. Please, don't say any of that. Greg will have to beat you.

Leave your answers in the comments section! I'll have the answers in a couple of days. I know you're all dying to know if you could Roll With Greg!


Blogger john sweet said...

GREG! I have time to not only read your BLOG... but to reply. Run now.

Before I answer your questions, I must commend you on choosing such a great name for your BLOG. I was totally lost until I looked up a translation. "Your luggage was rerouted to Hoboken." BRILLIANT!!

Okay. My answers to your tough questions:

1. Guinness and Tulamore Dew. It isn't one of your choices, but that's what I would be ordering. I might consider getting you some Glenfiddich. And, if that is incorrect... bleah.
2. gotta be "d"
3. I'm not one of the choices?!?!
4. "d"!! No... really...
5. I do not see the correct answer offered
6. "D" is for "definitely" "d"
7. better be "d"
8. Now I gotta make a wild guess... "C". But, I do remember what F.E.L.C.H. stands for! Does that get me a bonus?
9. Hmmmmm... another wild guess "B"
10. I would choose to say either, "You look like you washed your face in a sink full of kittens," or "I was in Third World Lover! I was in Aqualung Pocket... 'Whipped Cream! Rub it all over your bod-ay!' "

So, how was my score?

Rock on! Peace

Uncle Monster

15/7/05 10:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

1. a)
2. d)
3. b)
4. b)
5. d)
6. d)
7. d)
8. a)
9. b)
10. d)

16/7/05 6:54 AM  
Blogger ymelendez said...

I thought your nickname was "snuggle muffin".....

16/7/05 9:36 AM  
Blogger Greg said...

Yazil: Only one special person calls me "Snuggle Muffin" ...

Where are your answers, young lady????

16/7/05 11:29 AM  
Blogger Gordon said...

I'll go ahead and answer - in fact, I'll have to "borrow" this idea for my blog.

OK, here are my answers:

1) B
2) D (only we're watching Doctor Who)
3) A (I'm the one crushing on D)
4) D
5) A
6) A
7) D
8) A
9) B
10) D

16/7/05 11:53 AM  
Blogger fdfs said...

How can I answer when the comment page pops up and blocks out the questions? Anyway, I'm not cool enough to "roll" with anyone. I'm not quite sure what "rolling" with someone is. Does it involve doobies or physical contact? You young people with your bizarre, frightening lingo!

16/7/05 9:38 PM  
Blogger Matthew said...

Greg would most certainly drink Glenfiddich, neat. Greg would appreciate a single malt whisky, and would not bother with a blended whisky. Further, Greg would forego the margarita, because he would not waste perfectly good, 100% blue agave Tequila by diluting it with other substances, especially not a slushy frozen margarita.

17/7/05 5:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is for the guy that asked what does lets "roll" means it means like come on lets go
Lets roll my nigga nothing to do with doobies

14/12/05 8:40 AM  

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