All right, you crazy people, it's Scurvy Dogs contest time!

First of all: it's Erik Estrada's birthday! He's 56. Raise a glass to Ponch!

(My lovely wife just let me know that it's Flavor Flav's birthday too: he's 46. In light of his role in Scurvy Dogs, it's pretty cool that he was born today! Thanks, Lovely Wife Krys!)

Okay, contests are all the rage. People on the web are giving out things left and right. I've been telling you all to buy Scurvy Dogs for a couple of weeks now, and as far as I know, you haven't! (Okay, I have no idea if you have or not, I just felt like being dramatic. You can get information about how to buy it here, - you can't buy it directly from them - but why would you? I'm going to give it away!)

So, why should you want it? Because it's freakin' hysterical! I just re-read it, and it's still freakin' hysterical! Almost every panel has something quotable - you don't even need the context! (Watch: "The cow says: TRUE!" See? Hysterical! Okay, maybe you need the context. How about this: "Yes, but why should we hire you, Mr. Blackbeard, rather than some other pirate captain with a similar background in ... 'keelhaulin' and skull-duggery'?" Come on, people!)

Okay, I got off track there. This is a comic that everyone with a sense of humor can enjoy - you don't even have to like comics! And I'm freakin' giving it away. Yes, that's right: Giving. It. Away.

But ("crap," say you, "there's a catch" - well of course there's a catch - it's a contest!) you have to earn it (I typed that in my best John Houseman voice). I want you to tell me why you deserve to receive this excellent tome, why you are worthy! How can you prove your worth? Well, here's what you do:

E-mail me. The subject is "Scurvy Dogs contest." In this e-mail, you'll tell me why you deserve a copy of this book. But you must talk like a pirate in your e-mail. Go to the links I've provided to see some excellent examples! If you're of the poetic frame of mind, you can write in the form of a sea shanty. Obviously, the funnier you are, the better - it's a freakin' comedic comic book! (If you have a blog, include the URL in your e-mail. I'll give you some pub, for what it's worth.)

I encourage all the non-comics fans who read this blog (that includes you, Roxy!) to enter - I personally vouch for the excellentness of this book. Ask a comic book reader if you don't believe me! I'll give you until the end of the month. That's two whole weeks! You can almost taste the pirate goodness!

That is all. Return to what you were doing - but get to composing!