Delenda Est Carthago

Why not delve into a twisted mind? Thoughts on the world, history, politics, entertainment, comics, and why all shall call me master!

Location: Mesa, Arizona, United States

I plan on being the supreme dictator of the country, if not the world. Therefore, you might want to stay on my good side. Just a hint: ABBA rules!


Don't say "populism," the strange world of King George, kids saying "BOOB," Ninja Made Easy, and religious wackiness - all in the links!

Another week, another batch of links. I actually made time to find them this week! When CPS takes my kids away, I hope you all appreciate the work I do for you to bring the terrible wonder that is the Internet!

N.B.: Some of these links are a few weeks old. I started exploring the web and found some cool stuff before real-world concerns overwhelmed me. But I hung onto them because they're neat. Just so you know.

HERE'S SOME FUNNY STUFF. We must always laugh in the face of Armageddon!

Why you should eat venison.

The Dick Cheney shooting explained with comic book covers. More specifically, Jonah Hex covers. Very funny. I got this at Superfrankenstein.

Another Cheney joke, as Chris McLaren brings us the eleventh way Dick Cheney can kill you. I just like the first ten ways:

GayProf plays matchmaker. Look out - it's pretty gay!

Disintegrating Clone gives us masterpieces with crap endings!

POLITICAL GARBAGE. It's not all fun and games, people!

The South Dakota House has passed a bill banning almost all abortions. All hail taking rights away from women and giving them to tiny blobs of protoplasm! This is, of course, a tactic designed to get an abortion case in front of our new, medievally-minded Supreme Court. Won't that be fun! I found this at Balloon Juice.

Democratic Peace links to a very interesting post: The same Google search inside China and outside of China.

David Brooks says liberal blogs are "Stalinist." Charming. That makes conservative blogs "fascist," I guess. I saw this fun tidbit at Donklephant.

The new dirty word in the world is ... populism! How dare people vote for whomever they want instead of whomever the Americans want!

This is an interesting post: Did we have a chance at good relations with Iran but screwed it up to invade Iraq? The post includes links to the various sources.

THE STRANGE WORLD OF KING GEORGE. What color is the sky there?

This has been making the rounds through the blogosphere, but what the hell, I'll link to it: Glenn Greenwald talks about the new definition of a "liberal" as someone who disagrees with Bush. And he's conservative, mind you. Of course, conservatives everywhere ripped him a new one, and he discusses the reactions here. The first link is from Andrew Sullivan, another conservative who knows about getting ripped by Bush cultists. A lot of people have spouted off about this and one of the more interesting posts about it is here.

Here's the story of a VA nurse who wrote a normal, First-Amendment-protected letter to editor critical of Bush, and who got investigated for "sedition!" As Kurt Wagner would say, unglaublich. Welcome to Bush's America. This comes to us from Andrew Sullivan.

Did this get a lot of press and I missed it? I'm not sure. It should have. Pat Roberts, the chairman of the Senate Intelligence Committee, told Tim Russert on Meet the Press that Bush is above the law. Simply astonishing.

The Bush administration is planning to sell lots of public land in the near future. I'd say this is surprising, but it's not. That's our land, you know, not Bush's. And nobody we vote for cares. I saw this at Shakespeare's Sister.

Speaking of selling things, our wonderful government also plans to let oil and natural gas companies pump on federal land without paying royalties. Very nice. This is from Welcome to the Sideshow.

CHILD-REARING. I certainly don't know anything about this.

The great battle: Putting kids to bed!

Give that kid an Academy Award!

What happens when your kid learns the word "BOOB."

EDUCATING THE KIDS. After the rearing comes the teaching.

Here's a shocker: Parents and teachers don't see eye-to-eye on students and how to deal with them. I know - try to control your surprise. It's actually an interesting article.

Not only do they not see eye-to-eye, but a lot of parents don't understand the need for better math and science education. This comes from Education Wonks.

THEME LINKS. It's all about themes at various blogs.

Ye Olde Comic Booke Blogge this week has been all about being a ninja! Yes, it's Ninja Made Easy Week! Here's the introduction. Then we have how to meditate, how to skulk around like a ninja, the tools of a ninja, how to become invisible, and finally, the use of martial arts. You'll be joining G.I. Joe or taking over the Japanese underworld in no time!

Meanwhile, over at Dave's Long Box, which needs no advertising from a small fry like me, has been doing Dude Looks Like A Lady Week, in which male comic book characters are inexplicably turned into women. Ah, comics! We've seen Guy Gardner, Mantra, Glory, and J'onn J'onnz. I don't know why J'onn isn't female more often - he's a shapeshifter, for crying out loud!

Finally, over at The Comic Asylum, James Meeley brings us: Guy Gardner Week! He looks at Green Lantern #59, Green Lantern Corps #207, Justice League America #45, Justice League America #33, Green Lantern (Vol. 2) #25, Guy Gardner: Warrior #42, (the one where Guy turns into a woman, as seen above!), and Justice League #5. Good stuff for Guy-haters everywhere!

OTHER COMIC BOOK GOODNESS. Because you love them so!

Avi Green, who blogs about comics from an almost reactionary political position, has a very interesting new blog, The Comic Book Discrimination Dossiers. He talks about what it is and why he did it here, and he's already (or only) posted two characters: Elasti-Girl and Sue Dibny. I dislike a lot of what Avi writes (his main blog is The Four Color Media Monitor), even though he's usually erudite, but this is a very interesting project.

Frank Miller is close to finishing his Batman vs. al-Qaida comic book. How fun! I first saw this here via Ace of Spades, although it's been floating around cyberspace for a few years. More thoughts here.

Comic book speculation is back! This is from Comic Book Commentary. For comic book fans, there's really no worse word to hear than "speculation," as it almost destroyed the industry in the early 1990s.

Sleestak points out the time DC snuck something past the Comics Code Authority. Those subversive madmen!

CARTOON AND COMIC STRIP STUFF. Totally different from comic books, you understand.

Nik links to this page, which features cartoon characters' skeletons. Like Betty Boop's!

The Phantom turned 70 on Friday. Here are some fun facts about everyone's favorite purple-suited hero! (Warning: facts may not be accurate.)

How to make "Garfield" interesting? Remove all of Garfield's speech:
More strips at the link. Strangely surreal! I found the link to these at the Ministry of Information. (Sorry about the size of the strip. You get the gist, though, right?)

Sure to offend uptight Christians and Muslims everywhere - it's "Jesus and Mo!" Of course, if you have a sense of humor, you'll like it. "Buy your own spikenard!" Tee-hee. I found this at Andrew Sullivan.

RELIGIOUS WEIRDNESS. I respect people who are spiritual, but religions are just bizarre.

Villages in Vanuatu worship an American called John Frum - he promised them "planeloads and shiploads of cargo" if they worship him. This is from Pharyngula.

This is a depressing story: This preacher goes around the country holding seminars that teach elementary schools kids how to challenge evolutionary statements by their teachers. Just sad. And pretty disgusting, too. Send your damned kids to private Christian schools or home-school them if you want to stuff them full of narrow views. I found this at Balloon Juice.

You knew this was coming: Brokeback Mountain has been banned in Muslim countries. Because, you know, people can turn gay from watching movies. Why, after I saw My Own Private Idaho, Swoon, Edward II, and especially Top Gun, I know I couldn't help myself any longer! This is from Andrew Sullivan.

Who will care for your pets after the Rapture? That's assuming you're heading heavenward, of course. Go here to find a fine, upstanding heathen to watch Fluffy. I found this at Pharyngula.

In case you're a Christian and you're simply not offended enough by the world, apparently AOL is raising up the anti-Christ. You see, their new Instant Messaging system's slogan is I AM (IM - get it). Some Christians think this is blasphemous. I'll put that in italics in case you didn't get the full impact. Some Christians think this is blasphemous. This link is a few weeks old, so AOL may have backed down by now, but it's still a wacky story. I found this at Andrew Sullivan.

You know that woman in Texas who cut off her daughter's arms and killed her? Yes, it's a charming story. Well, her pastor testified this week and he said that she's not insane, she's possessed. According to this guy, all mental illnesses are really demonic possession. I wonder why I studied the Middle Ages in school, because we're living through them right now.

THE RISQUÉ SECTION OF THE LINKS. Whatever you do, don't let the children see these! Think of their future!

I'm sure you know that curling is the hip sport of the Winter Olympics. Well, of course there has to be ... a nude calendar of lady curlers! The photographer's site is here, and you can buy it here, where it's "temporarily sold out," or if you're one of those wacky Europeans, here. It includes photos like this:

Let me tell you, that would have to be the official curling attire to get me to watch it - it's freakin' shuffleboard on ice, people! I stole this picture from this site, where you can learn about every nude calendar ever created, including this one.

Do want more breast enhancement information? Sure you do! Go here!

A weaving driver was pulled over recently. Why should you care? Turns out he was distracted by several porn magazines on the seat next to him. Now that's multi-tasking!

Sarcastic Sex Toy Blog reviews the "Rich Bitch Doll." Warning: that second link takes you a place you may not want to go! The review, however, is very funny.

X-rated cookies were accidentally sent to Brooklyn politician's fundraiser. Yeah, "accidentally." Sure.

Did everyone know it was sex week at Yale? Some people, naturally, were a little upset. I'm upset I didn't study harder so I could go to the Ivy League!

This is quite possibly the most disturbing blog I've ever seen. I'm totally serious. Don't click on the link, please! PLEASE! It's devoted to touring virtual prostitutes and rating them. I honestly can't believe I just typed that. If that's your thing, this is the place. Don't believe me? Where would I have gotten this picture?

STUFF YOU CAN BUY ON-LINE. Never let it be said I don't love capitalism!

Those South Koreans - always trying to make the world better! Don't believe me? Just check out The Bust Doctor! How can you resist the hook: "15 minutes per day is efficient to make good shaping bust"? Answer: You can't! Get yours today! This link is courtesy of Dave Barry's blog.

Chris McLaren found something scary in his travels across cyberspace:

I'm not spending much time in that house! He found that picture here, where you can find more creepy family photos from the 1970s and, of course, products with the photos on them!

VALENTINE'S DAY STUFF. Smell the romance!

Star Wars Valentines. Lots of good ones, including:

I found this at Sarcasmo's Corner.

The always-hilarious Chris Sims brings us Valentines from the crypt!

Wouldn't you like a nice, violent Valentine like this? Beaucoup Kevin links to X-Men Valentines. How 1990s!

SEXUAL HARASSMENT LINKS. Because some people suck.

This is a weird story. A Baltimore comptroller and ex-Maryland governor makes woman who brought hima drink come back and walk away again so he can check out her booty. Apparently the guy, who's 84, has a history of this sort of thing, and women who work with him don't mind in the least. The story doesn't say what the reaction of the woman was. One would hope she poured the drink into his lap, but I doubt it.

Good advice for you wild people out there: Always film your gangbangs. That link contains extremely graphic language, but it's a depressing story - a woman claimed a bunch of college students raped her, but someone filmed it and she was apparently loving it. False rape claims get me down. There's too much real rape in the world for people to treat it so cavalierly. I found this at Ace of Spades.

Some guy in Tulsa allegedly bit his girlfriend's nose off. Yeah, I know. I couldn't quite believe it either.

SPIDER-RELATED MISCELLANY. Because the eight-legged will inherit the earth!

Check out this assassin spider! Talk about bizarre. I found this at Blog for Arizona.

Spencer Carnage discusses the Spider-robot developed by NASA. In answer to the question of his post, yes, I am scared.

MORE ANIMAL MISCELLANY. We can't just single out the spiders, can we?

PZ Meyers brings us the Friday cephalopod!


Metrokitty gives us cool pictures from England, including this one, my favorite:

POPULAR CULTURE GOODNESS. You must love the culture that is popular!

How will you be defined in the dictionary?

Gregory Burgas --


A person with a taste for acorns

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at

From Mah Two Cents.

Roger rants about Beatles albums. Because Paul McCartney was actually in a band before Wings! (Yeah, I know. Old joke.)

Chris tells us what he learned while watching VH1's Top 100 Teen Superstars.

Is Bollywood remaking Fight Club?

GayProf waxes nostalgic about TaB. My sister and I used to drink TaB by the caseload. It was the only soda my grandmother had in her house. Now I can't imagine drinking it. It's disgusting.

Here's a fun rant about 24. I was thinking about having an all-24 category, because I probably could if I wanted to, but I decided on just having one link about the wacky show.

This post from Dave's Long Box is the typically hilarious post, but the reason I linked to it is because I saw this on it. Just click it. I can't tell you what it is, because it would ruin the fun. Nothing dirty, I promise!

I bet you can't guess when the remake of The Omen is going to be released!

The question of the ages: Transformers or Gobots?

Ah, yes, of course it is: Chewbacca's blog. Find the entry for February 1. It's very funny and pretty offensive. Isn't that what makes the world go 'round?

Please don't build this car!

Laura points out the Top Ten Sci-Fi movies that never existed. Since seeing it there, I've seen it more than a few places. Interesting how that happens.

Dave's Long Box is stealing my linking schtick, but he has some very good ones, including What Should I Put On The Fence? and Antonio Banderas' blog (the handsomest man alive, mind you) and some creepy-ass portraits:

I recently told Kanye West to shut up, and now the ladies at Go Fug Yourself have a wonderful picture of the awful glory that is Kanye:

FUN WITH VIDEOS. Those moving pictures - they have a future, I tell ya.

It's the world's smallest Pacman game! This I found at Superblog!!

This is very neat: it's a Sleepless in Seattle trailer that turns the movie into a thriller/horror film. I found this a few weeks ago at Laura's blog.

For those who don't watch Saturday Night Live, the web offers the highlights, including this tribute to young Chuck Norris. Excellent stuff. I found this at AP's blog.

RANDOM NEWSWORTHY MISCELLANY. I can't fit everything into a category!

This is certainly freaky: A Canadian couple has electronic chips implanted in their heads that allow complete access to each others' lives. Go read it - it's bizarre. I got this from Heretical Ideas.

Should we have professional juries? An interesting question. I can't remember where I saw this. I'm sorry if I stole it from you and didn't give you credit.

Some thoughts about a neo-Nazi demonstration in, of all places, Seattle, one of the more liberal places in the country.

This is just sad. A teenaged girl has had her prosthetic leg stolen for the second time in three months. People who steal these kinds of things will go in the camps when I'm dictator, I'll tell you that much. I found this at Heretical Ideas.

Well, that's it for this week. Enjoy the grooviness, people! Remember - the Internet is not to be trifled with! Use it only with my supervision!


Blogger Sleestak said...

There's a Mad Magazine feature from years and years ago with cartoon characters' skeletons. I'm surprised no one has yet referenced that.

19/2/06 4:58 PM  
Blogger Chance said...

Well done again sir!

19/2/06 10:45 PM  
Blogger Roger Owen Green said...

Pat Roberts - ya noticed how similar that name is to a noted alleged pastor? Yeah, it got some play for one news cycle, then other stuff took over.

19/2/06 11:16 PM  

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